The key is to respect the reader’s feelings by writing for the reader. When you hold the reader in high esteem, you get better results… and less pushback or passive-aggressive resistance.
Here are some ways to do this:
Words like please, cooperate, appreciate, glad, can, accept, give, happy, help, will, good, and thank you stimulate positive feelings.
Instead of writing, We can’t permit you access until you get security clearance.
Turn it into a positive statement. As soon as you get your security clearance, we will be happy to give you access.
Example: It’s always a pleasure to do business with you, Carla.
Instead of We will allow you. Say Yes, you can.
Instead of We wish to suggest, say, Will you please.
This language is more personable and friendly.